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I have been meeting potential dates online for a very long time. Not because I'm such a swinger, but because I'm comfortable online, and not comfortable in social situations, so I meet people that way and now have a long string of mostly disappointing first and sometimes second dates behind me.

A few months back, I met someone really interesting, Teresa. We got together for coffee, seemed to hit it off, then she had an elsewhere to be for dinner, so we met again after that for a drink. And I was excited. And then I never heard from her again.

I am so, so tired of the flakes and the disappointments. And yet I keep internet dating, waiting for something to change. I seem to recall a certain definition of "insanity"....

So even though I am uncomfortable at social events and would rather spend a nice Saturday night at home, I'm probably not going to meet anyone that way.

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( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
superplin
Aug. 2nd, 2009 06:04 pm (UTC)
So, does this mean you're going to try alternate paths to dating? Because I'm really interested in that, too, although I'm not quite sure how it works.
masqthephlsphr
Aug. 2nd, 2009 06:44 pm (UTC)
I am really, really sure not how it works, either. I think it involves having outside interests and going to groups that revolve around these interests and chatting up the cute single people of your preferred gender and sexual orientation who just *happen* to be there.

I suck at that for multiple reasons, not the least of which is I have few interests that involve other people on any regular basis.
superplin
Aug. 2nd, 2009 06:57 pm (UTC)
Well, I guess the bonus is that you have fun even if you don't end up dating, and there's the whole network effect as well. Most of the people I've met through improv are way young and/or folks I'm totally not interested in, but who knows where it will all lead?
masqthephlsphr
Aug. 2nd, 2009 07:06 pm (UTC)
Yeah, but a lot of times I do stuff I wouldn't do unless I was trying to meet somebody. There's really not a lot of stuff I like to do for its own sake that's going to get me out meeting new people.

Inevitably, I force myself to get out and do stuff, but I do it hoping someone interesting will be there to date, and you just can't go into it with that single-minded attitude.
spiletta42
Aug. 2nd, 2009 08:10 pm (UTC)
Yeah, when you figure it out, let me know. There are no interesting and/or hot single people of any gender or orientation hanging out in my mother's basement. I've established that beyond all doubt.

*sigh*
masqthephlsphr
Aug. 2nd, 2009 08:32 pm (UTC)
This is why online dating was a workable idea for me. I like to talk, to have interesting conversations with interesting people. And online, you can do that with new people you're meeting. In fact, that's what the internet is *for*. So why not use that as an avenue to get to know them in real life and maybe date?

It sounded good on pixels. Less workable in actuality.
spiletta42
Aug. 2nd, 2009 08:46 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I've noticed. Of all of the people I know who have tried online dating, you are the one who has had the best luck.
sidherian
Aug. 2nd, 2009 11:06 pm (UTC)
You and me both. I periodically try again, and even when just looking for new friends it tends to be a nightmare (like the woman who got totally drunk and had to be taken home). And there isn't much I would go out and do in a group environment as I don't generally play well with others..........but I won't find anyone sitting at home and studying.
masqthephlsphr
Aug. 2nd, 2009 11:14 pm (UTC)
It's hell being the naturally anti-social type. My dad was a total loner, but he met my mom, who was similarly-inclined although maybe not quite as extreme. But I got their loner genes up the wazoo.
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )